Take Control

I know I usually discuss the greatness of teams, but today I am going to focus a bit more on the individual. A team is strong because of the sum of the individuals, so some light should be shed on how to better yourself in order to strengthen your team. As human beings we are social beings, and thus emotional beings (most of us!). Each person needs to remember what they are in control of.... their emotions. Being surrounded by a group of people whom you value and feel supported by, is a beautiful thing. But I am a firm believer of "you can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves." Now this might sound a bit harsh for my usual teamwork and supportive vibe, but I believe it still applies at the core. A lot of times we can get so caught up in what other people think and other's opinions that we get overly emotional. We let people get under our skin that we really shouldn't bother about, and thus we give these people SO MUCH power over us. Think about it... if you let someone get you so worked up and upset about something, you give them control of YOUR happiness. That is SO much power that they don't deserve!! Now I am not saying that this is easy... it's actually really hard. But take a second and think this through. Each time you get upset with someone, CONSIDER THE SOURCE.

For instance, lets say you run a business. And someone decides that they don't like the way you communicated with them as a client and they go on a rant telling you how you should conduct business. Now, you should always take people's opinions into consideration, but in this situation I would ask myself..."Has this person ever ran their own business? Are they an opinion leader in the field? Do they really know what they are talking about and have the experiences to prove it?" This way you will force yourself to separate which opinions you actually, truly value. It is the opinions that you truly value, that you should allow to tug at your emotions a bit more. So think about it... do you give people too much power over you? If we let every little thing that goes wrong or bugs us, tweak with our happiness and derail us from our goals we are giving the undeserving, a crippling amount of control over our happiness and over all progress towards our goals. Your teammates are always there to support you and help you get back on track, but take the first step towards your goals by being in control of yourself!

So give it a go and if you need a reminder when something/someone is testing you, repeat after me (modified from inspirational speaker Esther Hicks) : 

"My happiness depends on me, so you're off the hook."

And then demonstrate it. Be happy, no matter what someone else is doing. Practice feeling good, no matter what someone might have said that bugged you. And before you know it, you will not give anyone else responsibility for the way you feel. And then you might actually might have more love in your heart for these people... Because the only reason you don't love them, is because you're using them as your excuse to not feel good. Take control!